When the Unexpected Strikes

Maybe you've been planning for months or even years. Maybe you had a dream and worked hard toward that dream. Maybe you've felt that your entire life's purpose centered on one thing.  What if that one thing collapses? What if you're standing in the middle of the field of your dreams and for whatever reason, you see it fade from your reach?

From well-intended friends and mentors, you might hear the instructions to, "let it go," "take the high road," or "not let it bother you." You might hear, "count your blessings and see the positives" and want to scream, because if you just watched your dreams die, the feeling of loss and disappointment is absolutely overwhelming.

When the unexpected strikes, when life doesn't go according to your plan, to say that it's difficult is an understatement. And yet, ALL OF US will experience grief, loss, and disappointment in our lives. Things simply don't go our way all the time. 

To add to the challenge, we live in a culture of social media, where everyone has smiling photos and posts the rose-colored version of their lives. It's easy to perceive that your life MUST be inferior to everyone else's.

My question is ... what do you do with all of this? Will you let it knock you down? Will you cry or scream or rant to a friend and then start to pick up the pieces? Or will it consume you? Will you get stuck in the cycle of anxiety or depression? Will you complain again and again, but take no action?

No matter where you are right now, you have choices. We always have choices. The first step is the simple awareness that we DO have control over one thing - how we respond to our circumstances. This doesn't negate the sorrow or frustration you feel. This doesn't negate the challenge. But to recognize the fact that you can execute step-by-step choices can feel empowering in the darkest of times. 

After "feeling all the feels" of unexpected disappointment and broken dreams, take some deep breaths and work to clear your mind of self-criticism. Pull your attention back and settle into the moment. Then craft a plan ... a step-by-step plan ... of how you're going to rebuild, begin again, start fresh. Maybe then you can see that glimmer of gratitude for the roller coaster of life - because you are still on it - and you can always learn more, and start again and enjoy the ride.

If you need support on a journey to rebuild, I'm here with customized programs to help. Reach out when you're ready: jonisturgill@gmail.com or text 724-713-7280.